PJs and The Big Red Carpet
Do you know what “fitting in” is? It means you’re included in a generalization. If you wore pajamas to a black-tie event, you wouldn’t fit the generalization, “All the guests looked their best”. You wouldn’t fit in either. Sticking out would be uncomfortable.
For every generalization, there are always exceptions. “Everyone knew the lyrics to the song except that one girl who just hummed along awkwardly.” ”My classmates are cool, except this one guy who stares at his feet and doesn’t make eye contact.” No one wants to be that “one girl” or that “one guy” who people remember because of their faults. Fitting in is more comfortable.
Perhaps you fit in more than you realize. People may assume you fit generalizations like these:
- Homeschoolers are self-righteous and judgemental.
- Political activists are loud and pushy.
- No one compliments the janitor.
- Guys don’t wash dishes.
- People who share their faith don’t know when to shut up.
- Companies only give away free stuff if it’s worthless or part of a marketing scheme.
- iPhone owners are always distracted.
- Nobody asks how the waiter’s family is doing.
- Young people don’t take an interest in an elderly person’s life-story.
- Sons tell their mothers “I love you” only on special occasions.
Society expects us to fit into these generalizations. You stick out if you don’t.
Do you want to fit in?
It takes a just a simple act to break from the norm. A little word, a little note. It won’t even cost you a dime. No one expects you to show concern for the checkout girl with the flu symptoms. No one expects you to say “Hey, get better soon” and mean it. The entire world – including the checkout girl – expect you to just pay and leave. That would be fitting in. But just because it’s unexpected doesn’t mean it’s unappreciated.
Who are the people that inspire you? What makes them so memorable? The fact that they meet status quo? I doubt it.
Fitting in is safer. But being exceptional is more meaningful.
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