Whatever glory you bring to the grave, you leave with it. In this sense, life is hollow. An empty room for breathing in.

This is why our focus must be beyond the grave. We must live with eternity in our eyes and in our ears the majesty of a billion voices giving all glory to our Lord and Savior. Imagine it:

And I beheld, and I heard the voice of many angels round about the throne and the beasts and the elders: and the number of them was ten thousand times ten thousand, and thousands of thousands;  Saying with a loud voice, Worthy is the Lamb that was slain to receive power, and riches, and wisdom, and strength, and honour, and glory, and blessing.  And every creature which is in heaven, and on the earth, and under the earth, and such as are in the sea, and all that are in them, heard I saying, Blessing, and honour, and glory, and power, [be] unto him that sitteth upon the throne, and unto the Lamb for ever and ever. [Rev 5:11-14]

But some young men may feel pressured to get married for the wrong reasons. Consider four of them:

  1. Don’t get married to cure you of your addiction to pornography. An alcoholic doesn’t automatically drop his vice just because he takes up drinking pure, healthy water. A healthy, blessed relationship with your wife won’t automatically cure you of your habit of looking at pornography. Here’s why: real intimacy requires self-sacrifice, a large investment of time and care, learning together and seeking her joy. This easily frustrates a porn addict because porn only requires an internet connection. It takes quite a bit more than wedding cake to break a habit of taking perverted shortcuts. God’s grace – and not a young bride – is meant to pull men out of dark, deep holes. Seek God’s grace regarding this addiction before seeking a wife. It’s what you would expect of a brother-in-law or future son-in-law. So do it yourself.

  2. Don’t get married to add the finishing touch to your pastoral call. “I’ve got the gifts, I’ve got the seminary degree and I’ve got a ministry opportunity – now all I need is a wife. Then folks will see me as pastoral material.” Don’t do that. Christ didn’t love His church because it validated Him before His followers, and neither should you. If you’re considering asking her in marriage, you should be willing to marry her even if you end up a fisherman, chimney-sweep, blogger or persecuted missionary.

  3. Don’t get married because you ‘owe her’ a wedding ring. Perhaps you’re feeling that you’ve dragged the relationship on way too long – and messed up way too much – to go back. So maybe you feel you owe her a wedding ring. First off: you owe her an apology. Don’t use marriage to glaze over your responsibility to face the music. Get your heart right before God and her. If needed, repent and seek forgiveness. Then seek counsel on whether the relationship should keep moving on. Saying ‘I do’ isn’t the same as saying ‘I’m sorry’ or ‘I forgive you’. Don’t carry these wounds into your marriage. Deal with them beforehand.

  4. Don’t get married because everybody else is doing it. According to cemetery records, quite a few of us are dying as well. And that’s no reason to hurry along and follow suit. For everything there is a time, and if God desires to mold you through marriage, He will make it happen in His time. Don’t rush it. By all means pray about it, have a healthy view of it, and don’t condone yourself if you desire it – but please: don’t throw yourself at the first girl who treats you nice. Slow down, dude.

Marriage is like anything else in life: it works well if you go about it the right way. Follow the Manual, fear the Lord and be ok with dying to yourself. Otherwise, take time to rethink it. You may not get this chance again.

What if we used these younger years for holiness, for learning, writing and striving to be as Timothy, to whom Paul said: “Give attendance to reading, to exhortation, to doctrine…Meditate upon these things; give thyself wholly to them…” (I Tim 4:13,15).

 When your children ask their fathers in time to come, saying, What mean ye by these stones? Then ye shall answer them, That the waters of Jordan were cut off before the ark of the covenant of the Lord; when it passed over Jordan, the waters of Jordan were cut off: and these stones shall be for a memorial unto the children of Israel for ever. Joshua 4:6-7

Once again the children of Israel were faced with a challenge, and once again God provided a miracle. He divides the waters of the Jordan river so that His people can cross over on dry ground. As they cross, twelve men are instructed to take twelve stones from the middle of the Jordan river and build a memorial when they reach the other side. A memorial that speaks of God’s provisions. A memorial that speaks of God’s miracles. A memorial that is shared from generation to generation.

Do you come out of trials or tribulations with something to show for it? When the Lord hears and answers your prayers, do you look for stones – deep truths, meaningful lessons, genuine testimonies – to carry with you to the other side? Do you seek to build a memorial to God’s greatness – or are His miracles lost in the wind?

It’s no secret that God wants His works to be remembered. He wants the children of future generations to ask: “What are these dry stones doing here?” so that their fathers may answer: “Those stones were once in the middle of Jordan but just as dry as they are here today, because God provided a way for His people to cross when no other solution was in sight.”

Too often we waste our Jordan rivers. We cry when we reach them, we sing as we cross them and forget as we leave them behind. Make good use of your rivers of tribulation: seek the dry stones with which you will build a firm witness for the Lord.

Then Samuel took a stone, and set it between Mizpeh and Shen, and called the name of it Ebenezer, saying, Hitherto hath the Lord helped us. I Samuel 7:12

Sometimes things don’t work out. Things you really wish did work out.

All the duckies were in a row, the violinist was ready to play, you and everyone else could have guessed the conclusion. It was a beautiful conclusion, or so you played it out in your mind.

That’s when, in His sovereignty, God said “No”.

And you struggle with that. Why halt something so beautiful? Why stop such a beautiful story from being told? Why end this in a way that I didn’t imagine and couldn’t have guessed?

And sometimes God doesn’t explain Himself right away. He’s sovereign afterall. He doesn’t have to explain Himself right away.

And in a couple of days, in a couple of weeks, sometimes in a couple of months or years, you might think back to your beautiful conclusion. And it will still look beautiful. It will still be the perfect fairytale story. And you might feel a longing in your heart. “Everything was adding up…”. Your heart may ask: “Why?”

And the only answer is: God keeps that mystery to Himself.

Don’t fight against God’s mysteries. Don’t struggle against them. Don’t wrestle with God’s secrets. Is He not the Creator? As His creations, are we not fruit of His imaginations? Then why insist your imagination must be fulfilled?

Years from now you will feel that longing in your heart again. Perhaps a nudge. Perhaps a sigh. Don’t meditate on what could have been for it will take you to a place you shouldn’t go. Eventually it will bring you around to this: I could have not followed God’s leading. And no one should spend much time considering that.

Open your fist. And your heart. That dream you had. Let it go. Please. For Him. “Lord, I thought I had sacrificed this hope for You already. But today I felt that longing and was reminded of that dream. Help me remember I gave up that dream for You.”

Follow His dreams. Please. He loves you much more than I could ever express. More than you could ever communicate.

What matters is that you are living in the center of His plan and that’s the safest place to be. Tomorrow is in His Hand just as much as yesterday was. Take a step forward and move onward.

Sometimes things don’t work out. But God’s love for you always does.

It always, always does.

In Acts 13:38, Paul concludes his sermon before the synagogue in Antioch with these words:

Be it known unto you therefore, men [and] brethren, that through this man is preached unto you the forgiveness of sins:  and by him all that believe are justified from all things, from which ye could not be justified by the law of Moses.

Paul had spent the previous minutes using history and the Old Testament to show how Christ was the promised Saviour. “Therefore, men and brethren” there is forgiveness of sins, and forgiveness much better than any sense of justice that can be achieved on our own.

Too often, when we’ve sinned, we try to appease God’s wrath by putting ourselves on a guilt-trip. Discouraged, dismayed and self-condoning, we sulk through the day, repeatedly bringing to mind our own unworthiness. A spiritual form of crying-over-spilt-milk. “This way, God will see how seriously I take my failures and let me off the hook.”

This is works-salvation and it’s wrong. As Christians, we serve a God who doesn’t need to be appeased. Instead, He seeks to be glorified. And God is most glorified when we cling to Christ for our every need.

Now is the Son of man glorified, and God is glorified in him. John 13.31

Oh, bummer.

“Neither,” you say, “I stand with the Declaration of Independence & Thomas Jefferson. That’s good enough enough for me.”

He says: “So you stand with the rebels?”

You say: “No. (Are you deaf?) I side with Thomas Jefferson & the Declaration of Independence. The end.”

He says: “You drink too much.”

His reasoning is simple: by siding with Jefferson & the ‘ole Declaration, you are adopting it’s stand regarding the English & rebels. There’s no way to side with a declaration without taking a stand alongside what said declaration declares to be true.

In our day and age, it’s popular to adopt an “anything goes!” approach to doctrine. When we talk about specifics of the Christian faith – such as God’s sovereignty, man’s depravity, local church, eternal security – I frequently hear people say something like:  ”I don’t take a stand either way. I believe the Bible & love Jesus. The end.”

That’s awesome that you believe the Bible and love Jesus. However, you must realize the Bible takes a firm stand regarding a plethora of specific doctrines. While the Bible doesn’t force us to adopt names (Calvinist or Arminian! Trichotomist or dichotomist!) nor defend the bitter fighting surrounding different declarations of faith (You abdominal heretic!), the Word of God does encourage us to dig down deep into the specific doctrines it teaches.

Paul was overjoyed to tell the Romans:

“Ye have obeyed from the heart that form of doctrine which was delivered you”. (Romans 6:17)

Knowing where you stand regarding the specifics of God’s Word is healthy. It’s also a sign of growing up. Hebrews 5:11-14 admonishes us not to be “dull of hearing” by contenting ourselves solely with the “first principles of the oracles of God”. Instead, we’re supposed to have our “senses exercised” as we dig into the “strong meat” of God’s Word. Sure, this might require tougher chewing and at times it’s hard to swallow, but strong meat strengthens our discernment, helping us “to discern both good and evil”.

Before you skirt the issue by saying “I stand with the Bible,” stop a moment and ask yourself: Does God’s Word draw a line? If so, on which side does the Bible stand? And then double-check you’re on the same side.

The question is, “What’s holding you back from being more dedicated to the cause of Christ?”

Simon and his brother Andrew were fishermen in the sea of Galilee. They were meeting their family’s needs and providing fish for the local marketplace. That’s a good thing. But notice what happens when Christ calls them.

And Jesus said unto them, Come ye after me, and I will make you to become fishers of men. And straightway they forsook their nets, and followed him. Mark 1:17,18

The same account in Matthew 4:20 says, “They straightway left [their] nets, and followed Him.”

Let this sink in: they walked away. They had been fishermen from a young age, their father having taught them the trade. Society expected them to be fishermen. They expected it of themselves. But when Christ called them, they were able to walk away.

Today, there are young men who could do much for the cause of Christ but they don’t, because they can’t walk away from their videogames.  They can’t walk away from wasting their money on the newest gadget, the newest iPod, iPad, laptop, HDTV screen, the latest fad. There are young women who could do much for the cause of Christ but they don’t, because they can’t walk away from their fairytale movies & silly stories. They can’t walk away from being dreamy and living life superficially. There are dating couples who could do much for the cause of Christ but don’t, because they can’t walk away from each other. They can’t walk away from the bliss of romance and having someone to hug. There are parents who could do much for the cause of Christ but don’t, because they are tied down with work & pursuing a specific lifestyle. They can’t walk away from trying to be like ‘the Jones’ even at the cost of debt. There are church-goers who could do much for the cause of Christ but they don’t, because they can’t walk away from the ease of being a ‘benchwarmer’. And there are hundreds of young people who find they can’t walk away from being addicted, accepted, lazy or online.

Do you feel like you can’t walk away? You feel that way because you can’t. You can’t do it alone.

And Jesus looking upon them saith, With men it is impossible, but not with God: for with God all things are possible. Mark 10:27

It is possible to walk away. It is possible to dedicate your time, money, mind & life to the cause of Christ. Ask yourself, “What keeps me from praying more? Studying more? Volunteering more at church?” Guys, ask yourself: “Why am I pursuing what I’m currently pursuing? How do my current objectives have a direct effect on the thousands who have never heard the Gospel? And what keeps me from trying to meet that need? Why is it the other guy who is missionary-minded and concerned for the lost world? Why not me?”

What’s keeping you back from setting “your affection on things above, not on things on the earth (Col 3:2)”?

So Samuel went and lay down in his place. I Samuel 3:9

We need more young people like this, who are willing to serve God ‘in their place’. No matter how monochrome your life may be, it is your place. It was God’s Hand that set you there. Your parents may be ungodly, your resumé may be shallow, your education may be wanting and – while your friends are off getting married – you may be the most single person in a 100 mile radius. Yet, are you aware that this is where God has placed you? Or perhaps do you lie down at night kicking against the pricks?

Young Samuel knew his place. Personally, I find his early responsibilities (opening doors, keeping the fire) quite boring. But it was where the Lord had placed him and he was content in it. He knew his place and served God in it.

For I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. Philippians 4:11

Modern Christianity – in an attempt to become more accepted – has adopted the fashions & flavors of a rotten, decaying culture. The idea is: we’ll look like the world, sound like the world and smell like the world but guess what? We’ll be full of yummy honest-to-goodness Christian purity on the inside! What you see on the outside is only packaging and doesn’t matter. God looks on the heart anyway.

Paul disagrees:

Abstain from all appearance of evil. 1Th 5:22

If it looks like the world, don’t hang around. The very appearance of evil should turn you off. No sheep in its right mind wears wolf clothing to be accepted by the pack.